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[Himmelsbach] Sam Hauser on Joe Mazzulla: “I would just say he’s like got a unique approach to the game. He pulls things from, like, soccer teams, pulls things from killer whales and how they go about finding food and prey, things like that.”



[Himmelsbach] Sam Hauser on Joe Mazzulla: “I would just say he’s like got a unique approach to the game. He pulls things from, like, soccer teams, pulls things from killer whales and how they go about finding food and prey, things like that.”

by EutaxySpy

44 Comments

  1. WallStreetDoesntBet

    The Boston Whales does have a “ring” to it

  2. EutaxySpy

    That documentary on Joe Mazzulla 30 years from now will be cinema lmao

  3. MediocreTake

    Not enough people know about how social killer whales are and how different pods have specialized in killing specific prey — even going as far as having different individual roles in the chase

    Luka Doncic is really just a big fat seal when you think about it

  4. dustinharm

    Mazzulla is behind the orcas sinking yachts all over the world.

  5. PhysicsImmediate4482

    One time my high school coach compared my playing to a goat humping a football. Then he kissed me. We won state the next day.

  6. The Celtics gameplan involves pulling out a Great White Shark’s Liver to eat it.

  7. Jack_M_Steel

    Was the idea of Ted Lasso formed off Joe Mazulla?

  8. Defendyouranswer

    You just know this guy has got some dark secrets 

  9. deluchas15

    Joe Mozzulla is a good coach. He did a good job coaching the Celtics. I think they got better at defense with him as their coach.

  10. whiskeyinthejaar

    “All my means are sane, my motive and my object mad.” – Captain Ahab Mazzulla.

  11. KembaWakaFlocka

    Coaches are weird people, im sure most of the people in this thread had some wild ones growing up.

  12. Mbanicek64

    I’m actually distressed that Joe hasn’t perpetuated any psychological warfare yet. We all saw the pathetic attempt to divide JB and JT today by Kidd. I’d like to see what Joe brings. 

  13. SellingCoach

    “I would just say he’s like got a unique approach to the game. He pulls things from, like, how to survive entirely on roadkill and dumpster diving, pulls things from killing and dismembering a human being and hiding the parts, things like that.”

  14. BobbyBueno

    A large portion of my Celtics rooting interest lies in Mazzulla. His idiosyncratic way of pulling inspiration from all over the place is fascinating, admirable, cool and just funny. I want them to win in part so his way of approaching the job and game is rewarded

  15. sallright

    Mazzula is grooming these fools to rob Fenway. 

  16. mamba-pear

    Kobe would’ve loved Joe.

    They’d watch Animal Planet together in preparation. Probably cosplay to mimic their instinct and point of view.

  17. Throway_Shmowaway

    The fact that the phrasing of this answer sort of equates borrowing soccer tactics to borrowing hunting techniques from orcas is too fucking funny.

  18. IPHOYGOAT

    movie geek and a geek about everything life i love him

  19. Snootasaurus

    Coach picked up some stuff from his West Virginia days…

  20. Reasonable_Fail4123

    People are gonna laugh but I remember seeing a clip of a famous NFL Offensive Line coach pull out during film session actual clips of silverback gorillas and using their stance as actual teaching technique for the players.

    How you would do something similar coaching basketball I dont know but good coaches are gonna find whatever way it takes to teach/motivate their players

  21. Hovi_Bryant

    Abstract thinking is great and all, but what?

  22. fred_crumbs

    Joe Mazzulla is like John Stewart’s character from Half Baked minus the weed.

  23. jefe_hook

    It’s not uncommon among coaches. I remembered former Spurs players saying Pop asked them to watch some animal documentaries.

  24. Jack_The_Sparrow_

    “Like, for example he does this thing on offense where he makes me get into the recovery pool and balance a ball on my face”

  25. too-cute-by-half

    I’m so glad this born-again, Black Italian man from Rhode Island with close-set eyes had a gift for basketball from a young age.

    Without hoops he might’ve been one of the wildest Sigma Male Grindset influencers of all time.

  26. Tasty_Ad_6229

    Everyone talking about Tatum and Brown, best player on the Celtics is Shamoo

  27. “He’s really inspiring,” continued Hauser. “Like, if he asked all of us to move into a giant compound and do everything he told us, we’d do it. We’d give him all our money. We’d cut off family and friends. If he tells us he’s the modern incarnation of Christ, well, I’m all in.”

  28. breadbinkers

    My only consolations for the Celtics winning a ring will be Jrue getting #2 and this absolute weirdo getting one

  29. giddyupyeehaw9

    The only good thing about the Celtics is that Joe Mazzulla is a fucking maniac and I’m here for it.

  30. DankTriangle

    Joe Mazzulla can coach intelligent mammals, it doesn’t stop at NBA players apparently lol

  31. ifeelitfade

    Joe “I can tell you the license plate numbers of all six cars outside. I can tell you that our waitress is left-handed and the guy sitting up at the counter weighs two hundred fifteen pounds and knows how to handle himself. I know the best place to look for a gun is the cab or the gray truck outside, and at this altitude, I can run flat out for a half mile before my hands start shaking”  Mazzulla 

  32. addiconda

    He probably took Will Ferrell seriously in the movie ‘The other guys’ about tuna having an appetite for lion

  33. DanManahattan

    That is taking a page from the Mamba Book of nature study.

  34. NotACreepyOldMan

    “He’s like a killer whale going crazy on its trainer at sea world”

  35. jetpack_operation

    idk this quote and whole comment section has me cry-laughing

  36. truth_2_point_0

    I need the Celtics to become a dynasty for a hot minute just so we can have the timeline where the next incarnation of Red Auerbach is a triple fusion of Patrick Bateman, Michael Cera, and a meerkat that was hiding in the fusion chamber at the time.

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