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Joe Cronin should be taken out back and shot out of a cannon



Just a friendly shout-out to Joe Cronin and special thank you for ousting one of the most electrifying NBA players out of Portland. We’re all thankful that we had your judgment call on a potentially uncomfortable situation for all of us that would have brought back Lillard before the start of training camp – yes we’re all thankful that you avoided awkwardness, not to mention multiple playoff appearances, free agent signings, and one of the best fan experiences in American sports.

Like check it out Joe – usually when you bag Scarlett Johansson and she wants back, unless you want to see her out and watch her bang your neighbor every day for the rest of your life, it’s typically good practice to try and “make things work” before settling back on your RedTube Premium subscription, ya know what I mean?

Some of us are still trying to figure out what “there’s no coming back from this” meant exactly but seriously Joe – from all of us in Portland, maybe you can just do this fanbase a solid, make like Lillard, and literally never come back, from anything, ever:

by plotrcoptr

32 Comments

  1. loudstain

    This guy wants to see us flame out in the first round again

  2. CluelessTennisBall

    He made the best of the situation. Also wow get help.

  3. RoseGardenForever

    Sounds like you’re having a fun Saturday…

  4. historyteacher48

    It’s going to be a tough 5 years to see whether or not this take will be vindicated. I hope you are wrong, but I fear you may not be.

  5. TubbzMcGee

    Some Blazer fans want to try for rings, not first round implosions.

  6. AceMcStace

    Bro i can tell you with confidence not a single person wasted time reading your weird fan fiction

  7. Hell_its_about_time

    TLDR: Out of touch blazer fan just found out we traded Dame

  8. iguessineedanaltnow

    Let it all out buddy. You’ll feel better soon champ.

    Also fucking lol at “free agent signings.” Dame never attracted a single big name FA to Portland. Nobody ever will. Dudes do not want to come here.

  9. Another “this is a 50 win team, trust me bro” fan bites the dust. People just now realizing this is the rebuild.

  10. exerlicious

    I was gonna make fun of your comment and then I looked at your history. I have a feeling you suffer enough in day to day life. Seriously I hope you get better some day

  11. Yikes. Dame is washed and him being gone is the best thing to happen to this franchise in a decade. We wasted a decade on a player you can’t build a winner around. Dude makes James Harden look like a good defender. Dame is All-Traffic Cone team in NBA history.

  12. LacklusterMeh

    I used to think we had the best fanbase in the league. I was wrong.

  13. toadtruck

    I have a question for you genius….what does “bringing Dame back for training camp” look like? What does him playing for Portland while actively sabotaging trade talks look like? Explain how that would work

  14. toadtruck

    I have a question for you genius….what does “bringing Dame back for training camp” look like? What does him playing for Portland while actively sabotaging trade talks look like? Explain how that would work. u/plotrcoptr grow some balls and answer me

  15. EndyFish6215

    Sorry that happened

    Or happy for you

    I’m not reading all that though

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